


I Thought You Were Vegan...?

by InfinityFizzyJuice



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Awkward Crush, Awkward situations, Fluff, Gay Panic, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Idiots in Love, M/M, Might be OOC, Misunderstandings, One Shot, Pining, Sharing a Bed, Spooning, gay idiots, gundham is an emo disney princess, i don't know what to tag, i guess idk, theres an animal in trouble somewhere
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:01:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27843385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfinityFizzyJuice/pseuds/InfinityFizzyJuice
Summary: “Tamer of Automatons,” Tanaka said as he took something from his desk. His tone was stern and serious with hints of haste and hurry. “I am recruiting you to join me on a life-threatening quest that we may not return from. We must journey without delay, there is a life at stake!”Sadly, in his drowsiness, Kazuichi only heard about half of that—not even. “What…? Steak? I thought you were vegan…?”-------------------------Or the fic where Gundham yeets Kaz out a window at 2am so they can save a dogEDIT: Now with a part 2!
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Soda Kazuichi & Tanaka Gundham, Soda Kazuichi/Tanaka Gundham
Comments: 48
Kudos: 254





	1. Late Night Adventure

Kazuichi Souda lay asleep in his dorm room, resting peacefully on his bed in Hope’s Peak Academy. The sounds of his light snoring bounced off the walls, the only disturbance in an otherwise tranquil area. It was deep into the night, a time where most people would be asleep, or maybe working the late-night hours running on nothing but caffeine.

The lone window in his room slowly creaked open, welcoming the light of the stars and moon hitting the floor. A dark shadow swiftly crept in, vaulted over the windowsill, and noiselessly landed on the ground. It scanned the dorm, laying its sights on the pink-haired mechanic sleeping in bed. Sneaking over, it loomed over him, taking in how still the man was compared to his moments awake. Bringing up a gentle hand, the shadow placed a hand on his shoulder, softly shaking him free from slumber.

“Souda,” it whispered, “Souda.” The male was unresponsive. “Souda.” Kazuichi rolled over to the other side, facing away from the figure at his bedside.

“Mmmm…Five more minutes…” he mumbled. The shadow let out a tired sigh, then tried again. This time, it bent down more, bringing its face closer to the bed. Its shaking was more aggressive compared to last time, much more rushed and impatient.

“Souda!” it lowly hissed. That seemed to do the trick. He turned to lay on his back, groaning with every movement. Brown eyes were revealed in the near pitch-black room as Kazuichi forced himself to wake, annoyed by whatever kept poking at him. The moment he saw what was over him, he screamed.

“AAGHH!! MONSTER!!” He took the pillow from under his head and smacked the shadow as hard as he could. “PLEASE DON’T KILL ME!!” He scrambled farther away from the edge of the bed, all while kicking his blankets and trying to clumsily flee from the intruder in front of him.

“Silence, mortal!” it shushed. “Do you wish for the Keeper of Defenses and Sanctuary to hear you and sentence us to damnation?” There was only one person Kazuichi knew who talked like that.

“Tanaka?” He really didn’t have to tell him to be quiet. The dorms were soundproof, so there was no way Sakakura would’ve been able to hear them. He either was trying to scare him into shutting up, or he forgot in all of Kazuichi’s yelling and was exaggerating to make a point.

Now knowing that he wasn’t in any immediate danger, Kazuichi relaxed and let down his guard. The feeling of sleepiness came back and hit him like a truck, along with a newfound weariness from being so abruptly woken. He put a hand to his eyes, trying his best to stay conscious long enough to say a complete sentence. “What’re ya doin’ in my room…?”

He couldn’t see, but Kazuichi heard Tanaka shuffling around his room and, a few seconds later, the lights were turned on. The sudden flash in brightness blinded him, and he shut his eyes. There were noises of Tanaka bumping and rummaging through who knows what in his room. If he wasn’t so tired, he would’ve been yelling his head off at his friend for invading his space. But he knew Tanaka wouldn’t do anything bad to him, that just wasn’t in his nature.

Their friendship was still new and somewhat shaky, having been off to a rough start at the beginning of the year. Plus, the worst part was that Kazuichi may have harbored the smallest, tiniest, itty-bittiest crush on him, but he was still trying to figure that part out.

“Tamer of Automatons,” Tanaka said as he took something from his desk. His tone was stern and serious with hints of haste and hurry. “I am recruiting you to join me on a life-threatening quest that we may not return from. We must journey without delay, there is a life at stake!”

Sadly, in his drowsiness, Kazuichi only heard about half of that—not even. “What…? Steak? I thought you were vegan…?”

“What? No, I—! Tch!”

Kazuichi crawled back under his covers and tried to block out the rest of Tanaka’s actions and voice in the background. This was going to be a problem for Morning Kazuichi, not the Night Kazuichi who was two steps away from passing out. Through closed eyes, he could see the lights being switched off. His body slackened and began heading back to sleep. In his slipping thoughts, he believed that maybe it was all a dream. It wouldn’t have been the first time he dreamed about Tanaka. An embarrassing fact, but it was still true. However, this was definitely one of the weirder ones if it really was a dream.

Unfortunately, he was dead wrong. He found that out when Tanaka slid his arms under his body and hoisted him up bridal style. Kazuichi flushed bright red at the unexpected contact and started to flail around in his panic.

“Wha—?! Tanaka!” he screeched. “What the hell are you doing?! Put me down!”

“Cease your childish nonsense!” he ordered as he carried him to the window.

“What the hell are you talking about?! You’re the one carrying me like this and—!” Kazuichi was cut off as his ass hit the ground. After being brought to the window, Tanaka had dropped him outside like a rock. It’s a good thing that his dorm was on the first floor along with the rest of his first-year classmates. “Ow!”

He sprang up and saw Tanaka climbing out of the window with ease, though the scene was blurry without his contacts. The breeder had his hair down, ditched the bandages and jewelry, and was dressed in a white T-shirt with black shorts along with dark purple slippers. They came face to face. His eye “scar” was gone, and his eyes were both gray.

“…Are you alright?” Tanaka asked.

“No! I’m not ‘alright’! You woke me up in the middle of the night and threw me outta my own window!”—he gestured to his lower body—“I’m not even wearing pants!” Tanaka looked down, his face growing red as he stared. Kazuichi Souda was indeed not wearing pants, only a pale pink T-shirt and his underwear. His neon trunks were on display for the world to see. It was simply more comfortable to go to bed with just a shirt and trunks. And then there was Tanaka, who he heard went to sleep commando. Kazuichi was just happy that the guy threw on a pair of shorts and didn’t walk around half naked.

“I-I-I a-apologize! I-I didn’t r-realize!” Tanaka rushed back into the room and turned the lights back on. He tripped over his steps as he made his way to Kazuichi’s drawers, fumbling through the clothing to find something the mechanic could wear. Once he found a pair of shorts, he hurled it out the window, causing the neon yellow clothing to hit Kazuichi square in the face.

“Gee, thanks,” he said sarcastically.

“Y-you should be grateful! I-I only require your skills, or else I would not have taken pity on a pathetic mortal like you!” How overdramatic can a guy get?

“Hey! Get my glasses too! I can’t see crap!” he yelled through the window as he got dressed. “And my shoes! They’re over there! Near the nightstand!” Tanaka did as he was told, then exited the dorm, looking away from his friend while Kazuichi snatched his glasses and blue slippers from his pale hands and put them on. “Okay, I’m up. You happy now?”

“…I suppose,” he coughed in reply.

He didn’t really like people seeing him without his contacts, but if Tanaka woke him up like this, it must’ve been important. At least, he hoped it was. With cleared vision, he saw what the breeder took from his room. On the ground next to the window was his red toolbox. “What’s that for?”

Tanaka picked up the toolbox and plopped it in Kazuichi’s arms. The sudden weight made him stumble a little, forcing him readjust his stance. Judging from the heft of the box, Tanaka likely just threw in whatever tools he saw, not even knowing what they would be used for. “Follow me.”

“Huh?” The breeder started walking away. “Hey! Wait up!” Kazuichi trailed behind him, trudging along the imaginary path Tanaka made with his footsteps. It was a beautiful night, not too cold with clear skies. The two Ultimates walked under the stars and made their way around the building in silence. However, it didn’t take long until Kazuichi got sick of the quiet. “Tanaka, what time is it?”

“Approximately two hours past midnight.”

“The hell? Whatever you’re dragging me along for better be worth it. You know some people aren’t ‘dark overlords’ like you, right?”

“Of course. No mere mortal could ever match the overwhelming power that is Gundham Tanaka!” He quickened his pace, black hair bouncing slightly as he walked. “But this matter is urgent.”

Kazuichi moved faster, trying to keep up with Tanaka’s long strides. “Okay, I’ll believe you on that last part, but you owe me some soda after this.”

“…You desire compensation?”

“Yeah! I didn’t get thrown outta my window for nothing!”

“You refused to move!”

“That’s cuz it’s two in the morning! Why’d you even carry me anyways?! I thought your skin was ‘poisonous’ or whatever!”

“I cast an incantation before using my strength to force you out of slumber! If it were not for my spell, you would’ve been dead upon contact!”

“That’s not an excuse to come through my window and throw me outta bed! Why didn’t you go through the door?! I could’ve just walked out on my own!”

“Time is of the essence, mortal!”

“I didn’t ask you to come in through my window, steal my stuff, and pick me up! What are ya?! Some kinda perv that wants to carry me around in my underwear?!” His mouth moved faster than his brain on that last part. He tried to take it back, but it was too late. “W-wait, I didn’t—!"

“H-how vulgar!” Kazuichi could only see the back of his head, but he assumed Tanaka was blushing heavily based on the color of his ears. Tanaka was stomping now, understandably upset at the accusation. He raised a hand towards his neck, but then lowered it when he realized there was nothing there. “Y-you hypocritical fiend!”

“Hypocritical!?”

“Your undergarments were obscured by your covers in the darkness! I had no knowledge of your nightly garb! You speak of perverted actions when you attempted to pathetically court the She-Cat in the past moons to satisfy your own selfish desires!”

“H-hey! I said I gave up on that!”

“Or so you say.”

“I’m telling the truth! And I’m not that much of a pervert! At least I don’t sleep with it all hanging out!”

Tanaka turned his head and looked back at him, his steps becoming more aggressive. “What?! Your astral level is simply not high enough! My enchanted undergarments cannot be seen by mortal eyes!”

“C’mon, Hamster-chan! Everyone knows you don’t wear underwear!”

“Impossible!”

“Hinata knows it! I know it! We all know it! I bet yer not wearing underwear right now!”

“Tch! I refuse to listen to your twisted words any longer!”

“That’s because it’s true, isn’t it?!” Suddenly, Tanaka stopped right in front of him, causing Kazuichi to crash into his back. “Augh! Why’d you stop?”

“We have arrived.” Stepping back, Kazuichi saw multiple industrial power generators near the side of the academy. The generators were mainly used for the big machinery and technology situated outside that couldn’t use the power from inside the school. He’s worked on these before, back when some of them got busted and he used his talent to repair them.

He turned to the breeder; whose eyes were fixated on something in the distance. “Okay, power generators. Great. Tanaka, why are we here?” He didn’t say anything, only marched to the generator he was staring at. Kazuichi followed him wordlessly, maneuvering past the rows of generators to the one at the far-right corner against the wall. Tanaka kneeled on the ground, motioning Kazuichi to come closer.

“Listen.” Opening his ears, he heard quiet whimpering accompanied by moans of pain. The realization hit him as he took a sharp breath.

“There’s an animal in there?”

“Precisely. To be more exact, a hellhound more commonly known to mortals as the beagle has been imprisoned in this metal cage in its search for shelter. I fear its leg may be seriously injured.”

“… _Oh_ ,” was all he could say. This was a good reason to wake him up. That was Tanaka for you, he would do anything to help an animal. It was one of the things he liked most about him.

“Yes, so can you free it from its confines?” Kazuichi placed his toolbox down and searched through it, looking for the right tool for the job.

“Of course, I can. Why didn’t you just say that?” He found the wrench he was looking for and got to work. “Also, I need you to shine the flashlight for me.”

Tanaka took the flashlight from the box and turned it on, pointing it where Kazuichi was working. “I did inform you and you blatantly ignored me.”

“Whaddya mean?”

“I said that there was a life at stake.”

“What? Dude, I thought you were talking about steak. Like, y’know, beef.”

He scoffed, irritated from the miscommunication. “Normally, I would incinerate you for associating me with livestock…but I suppose I am slightly at fault.”

“Yeah, you broke into my room. Pass me my Phillips screwdriver.”

“Er…”

“The one with the red handle? You threw in, like, four different screwdrivers.” He felt Tanaka hand him the tool. “Thanks.”

“To clarify, I did not ‘break in’.”

“You didn’t?”

“You foolishly allowed the portal to your domain to remain unguarded from the horrific creatures of the underworld!”

“…What?”

“…You left your window open.” So, it was his fault Tanaka got in his dorm. Figures.

“Crap, I did? Damnit.” All things considered, maybe it was best that he forgot to close it.

Pushing the metal aside, Kazuichi got past the final mechanism and could see the beagle cowering in the far corner of the generator, holding its left paw up in pain. “Tanaka, I see the beagle. Be careful.” He moved aside, letting the breeder take over. Tanaka spoke softly to the dog, so softly that he couldn’t even hear what he was saying, but it wasn’t long before he slipped out from the generator with the beagle in his arms. The dog was only a puppy, probably no more than 10 weeks old.

“The beast is safe, though his limb is broken. We must accompany him to a healer immediately.” While he talked, Kazuichi had been working on putting the generator back to normal.

“Yep, just give me another minute or two.” And, true to his word, he did get the generator back to normal—like nothing ever happened—with Tanaka’s assistance. “Okay, where do we go now? Everyone else is probably sleeping, so I dunno if you wanna crawl into their windows.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” he scoffed, “We are escorting him to a 24-hour well-trusted healing domain in the city.” With a sigh, Kazuichi gathered up his tools and went to follow Tanaka off the premises.

“Are we gonna be taking a bus or something?”

“Fortunately for you, the realm is well within walking distance. You won’t have to worry about getting ill.”

“Thank god.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Shut the hell up.” They both laughed at that, replacing the still night air with a warm, friendly atmosphere. Before long, the three of them arrived at the veterinary clinic. They stepped into a modern looking waiting room and were greeted by a sleepy looking woman at the front desk who perked up once she saw Tanaka enter.

“Oh, Tanaka,” she yawned. “What brings you here?” Her gaze trailed to the dog in his arms, expression changing to one of concern.

“A beast has been injured; his leg is broken.” He handed the dog to the woman, who took him down a corridor.

The two men followed her to the room farthest down the hallway. Large light blue counters and cabinets bordered the walls, and multiple containers of stuff Kazuichi couldn’t name lined the shelves. In a corner were some tubes and machinery all hooked up for something he wasn’t sure about. A few cages were set to the side, and the bright white lights shining above him gave him a headache.

“Where did you find him?” the woman asked as she set the dog down on the counter.

“Shivering deep within a mechanical monstrosity behind the territory known as Hope’s Peak, one that which fuels the abominations housed to the demons and spirits of the realm.”

“Yeah…I’m not gonna pretend I understood that.” She turned to Kazuichi with hopeful, yet weary, eyes. “Excuse me, mister…”

“Souda. The name’s Kazuichi Souda.”

“Souda, can you translate, please? My brain is working at half capacity right now.”

“Sure. We found him trapped in an industrial power generator.”

“Ah, thanks. Normally, I’d be able to understand some of what he says, but it’s way too late for this. It’s been a long day. Don’t worry, he’s in good hands. The doc will be here real soon.”

“Be sure to give him my gratitude,” said Tanaka.

“Of course! I’ll tell him you said hi, m’kay?”

“That is acceptable. I give you my thanks.”

She ushered them out towards the door, leading them to the front entrance. “Uh-huh. Now, it’s late. You two should be getting back to Hope’s Peak. We’ll take care of the rest. You’ll be able to visit him tomorrow.”

“Thanks again,” Kazuichi said, “Sorry to bother you so late.”

“Oh, it’s no problem. Any friend of Tanaka is a friend of ours.” She grabbed Tanaka by the shoulder, pulling him down a little while Kazuichi strolled out the door. Standing on her toes, she mischievously whispered not-so-quietly into his ear. “So that’s the guy you keep on talking about? You’re right, he does look cute.”

Huh?

Kazuichi glanced back for a split-second and saw Tanaka blushing furiously, his cheeks flushing deep red and eyes widening in embarrassment. The mechanic rapidly spun back, staring off at the building across the street. “Wh-what?! I have no knowledge as to what you’re referring to!” Tanaka said, way, way louder than he needed to. His maniacal laugh rang out, but it was more nervous and forced than normal.

He had already heard what that woman said. She was clearly trying to pull something, but he was too distracted with the fact that Tanaka called him cute. But then he denied it. Was he telling the truth? Or was it because the woman called him cute? Either way, someone thought he was cute and that was enough to make his brain short-circuit for a few seconds. Maybe it was best that he just pretended nothing happened, that might save him from an awkward return trip.

“Go get ‘im, tiger,” she said as Kazuichi heard her pat Tanaka on the back. Kazuichi picked up his feet and started walking back to the Academy, not even bothering to look back to feign ignorance. He really hoped that his face wasn’t a dead giveaway that he heard what they were talking about. Tanaka stumbled up next to him, looking away to hide his reddened cheeks.

So much for a normal trip back to the academy. The next few minutes were just plain uncomfortable. Neither of them had said a word since they left, and they kept on bumping into each other despite the good stretch of sidewalk they were walking on. He needed to escape, the atmosphere around him was suffocating. Turns out, his rumbling stomach was the thing to break the silence. The rumbles of hunger sounded out against the night, causing Tanaka to look his way.

“Oh…uh…” Kazuichi mumbled. He darted his eyes around the area, setting his sights on the door of a convenience store. The mechanic dashed to the building, zipped right in, and made his way to the fridges in the back. He let out a sigh of relief…then smacked himself in the face as he remembered he left Tanaka on the street. “Crap! I hope he’s not upset.”

“I’m not.” Turning around, he saw Tanaka towering over him. He let out a yelp.

“AH! Don’t scare me like that!” He didn’t even hear the guy creeping up behind him. “Oh, uh, sorry for leavin’ ya behind…”

“It’s alright, you desire sustenance for your mortal form.” Tanaka reached behind him, causing Kazuichi to scoot to the side. He opened the fridge and picked out a soda bottle with a neon green label from the variety of beverages. “This is your favorite brand, correct?”

“Y-yeah…How’d ya know?” His friend chuckled and flashed a genuine smile before he got a few more bottles and closed the door.

“It’s the brand I’ve seen you consume most often.”

“O-oh…r-right…” His mind was all over the place, and he couldn’t tell if this was better or worse than from a minute ago. He had no idea Tanaka observed him so carefully. It was no secret that Kazuichi loved to drink soda, but he drank so many different kinds he had lost count. For Tanaka to remember that, he must really care. “L-let me g-go get something.”

“Mm-hmm.”

He walked over to the snacks aisle and scanned through the bags and containers of chips and candy. Tanaka stood right beside him as he grabbed the ones he wanted. When he was done, Kazuichi was holding at least five bags. “This isn’t too much, is it?”

“It matters not to me. You desired compensation for your services and I will give it to you.”

“Did’ja even bring money?”

“I have in my possession a transactional card.”

“What? How’d you even know to bring it?”

“It would be unwise to leave my domain without it.” They made their way to the young man at the cashier. He scanned the items while the Ultimates continued their conversation.

“Isn’t that the kind of stuff girls usually do?”

Tanaka handed the cashier his card. “Kekekekekeke…Allow me to tell you a tale. Many moons ago, the Queen of Darkness and I were on a mission to find the ancient, cursed relics of old! The expedition was great and perilous, we nearly lost our lives many a time, but we found them in the maw of a wicked demon king!”

“Have a good night,” the cashier said as he finished up the transaction. He returned the card back to Tanaka while Kazuichi took their purchase from the counter, both Ultimates thanking the man before heading out the door. The pink-haired male slung the bag through his arm, took out a bag of chocolate, and ripped it open.

“Okay, you and Miss Sonia fought a demon. What then?” He popped a chocolate square into his mouth, the candy melting into a puddle of gooey liquid on his tongue.

“In the end, I was unable to provide an item of equal value to break the curse the relics had. I did bring something in preparation for the event of equivalent exchange, but it was lost in the dangerous battles the She-Cat and I fought. Luckily, she was able to break the curse on her own. She has come very far in her demonic training! Ahem, aside from that, to ensure that history does not repeat itself, she provided me a word of priceless advice as well as a tablet with cataclysmic power hidden within.”

“Hold on, so if I got all that correctly, you and Miss Sonia went shopping for some of your weird occult stuff and you lost your wallet?”

“…”

“So, after that, you decided to carry a credit card everywhere you go, right?”

“…Humph.”

“I’m guessin’ that’s what Miss Sonia told ya. And you just used the card she gave you to buy this stuff, didn’t cha?”

“Kehehehehe…Having this item in my inventory has become a habit of mine. Perhaps I underestimated you…”

“You’re a funny guy, Hamster-chan.” He took out another square of chocolate and held it up in front of his friend. “Here, have some.”

“I do not want any of your confections.”

“Aw, c’mon! I doubled checked the ingredients already. It’s vegan chocolate.”

“…Are you certain?” They stopped walking, Kazuichi still holding up the chocolate in front of Tanaka’s face.

“Yeah, I’m sure. Don’t you trust m—?” In a flash, Tanaka opened his mouth wide and chomped down on the piece of chocolate between his fingers. Though only for a short moment, Kazuichi could feel Tanaka’s warm lips touch the edge of his digits. A small trace of saliva was left from his mouth, the slight wetness cooling off his thumb in the night.

Oh god, oh god, oh god.

He was so close to him; his warm breath tickled his skin. The mechanic froze, not knowing what to do. He could feel his face turn deep red. Everything felt warm all over. Tanaka looked so dorky—so cute—as he bit down. The way his lips parted, the look in his eyes, the motions of his tongue…Kazuichi felt like he could just melt right then and there.

Then, Tanaka slowly reeled back, seemingly unfazed by the sudden and intimate action. His mouth moved up and down as he chewed, testing the flavor and the texture of the candy. Kazuichi heard him swallow it down and saw the lump go down the breeder’s throat, his pale neck moving slightly as he licked his mouth free of chocolate. Didn’t he say that his skin was poisonous?

“It’s good,” Tanaka admitted.

“Y-yep! I-I knew you’d like it!” Kazuichi sped-walked past him, making sure that there was no way Tanaka could see his blushing mess of a face. “C-c’mon! We gotta get back! D-don’t want anybody callin’ the police or anything! Hahahahaha!” He mentally slapped himself. His idiotic mouth just made things more damn awkward.

“I believe you are correct, mortal,” he heard Tanaka snicker behind him. “Your judgement is worthy of the Supreme Overlord of the Tanaka Empire!” At least he didn’t seem bothered by the bad joke and dumb laughter. It soothed him, knowing that Tanaka wouldn’t intentionally hurt his feelings.

The rest of the trip was chill, and they ended up walking side-by-side after Kazuichi had calmed down from his gay panic…which did take quite some time. When they arrived back the building, Kazuichi and Tanaka stopped right in front of their windows, which were right next to each other since the dorms were assigned in alphabetical order.

“Souda, I must thank you again for accompanying me this night…And I apologize for forcefully removing you from your realm.”

“It’s no biggie, there was an animal in trouble, right?” He paused. “And hey, come to think of it, how’d you know that dog was stuck?”

“A midnight messenger of the darkness delivered the message to me on cursed wings. Their words may have been silent to mortal ears, but my hearing is five times that of a normal human’s! My abilities are beyond compare!”

“So, what I’m getting from that is that an animal told you? A bird, right?” He gave a shit-eating grin and displayed his rows of sharp teeth. “You’re a Disney princess, Tanaka!”

Tanaka struck a dramatic pose, his face scowling as he did so, though it really didn’t have the usual effect since he was wearing pajamas. “I am no such thing! I am evil incarnate, Gundham Tanaka! The Supreme Overlord of Ice that is destined to one day conquer this mortal plane! I have not even shown you fiends half of my cursed power!”

Kazuichi nodded slowly, clearly not taking anything he said seriously. “Uh-huh, yep, you’re so right. But ya know, if you have magic hair, magic hands, can talk to animals, have a cursed name, were kidnapped or enslaved, poisoned, or your problems got solved because a big strong man showed up”—he stuck two thumbs out towards himself—“you are a princess, hands down.”

“Are you intentionally attempting to provoke me?” Tanaka stepped a little closer, a sly smirk on his face. “Less than half the things you speak are true.”

“Oh, really? Let’s see,” he started as he began counting off his fingers. “You’ve got magic ice-cream hair, a magical bandaged arm, you can talk to animals, you say your name is ‘cursed’—”

“I was not kidnapped or enslaved.”

“I dunno, man. I’ve seen you walk your Pomeranian. It’s more like it walks you.”

“That doesn’t’—”

“—You say your skin is poison, and who just help you save that beagle?” Kazuichi pointed at himself with his index fingers. “This guy! You are, one hundred percent, a Disney princess. Maybe you should replace Miss Sonia as the Ultimate Princess!”

“…I have no words.”

“Did I just make the Great Gundham Tanaka speechless?!” he said, pretending to be shocked. “Don’t worry, I’m sure she’ll still be friends with ya after you steal her talent!”

Tanaka’s expression relaxed, and a chuckle escaped his lips. He went towards his window, eyes not leaving his friend. “May you rest safely in your realm. Good night, Souda.”

“G’night, Princess Tanaka,” he joked. Climbing through the window, Kazuichi landed back in his dorm. He set his toolbox and bag of snacks and soda back on his desk and was about to take off his slippers when Tanaka poked his head in his room.

“Souda?”

“Tanaka? What’s up?”

“…I am afraid the entrance to my realm has been sealed.”

“What?” Kazuichi went back outside and stood in front of Tanaka’s window. He gripped the bottom of it and pushed up as hard as he could. After a second attempt, Tanaka joined him in his efforts. Despite the two of them working together, the window still didn’t budge. Upon further inspection, it looked like the lock was jammed and couldn’t be fixed from their side. “Did you shut your window behind you when you left?”

“I am positive I did not…”

Kazuichi shrugged. “It coulda closed on its own.”

“It is possible that the time limit for reentry into my realm had expired? Have my defenses and rituals worked too well?”

“What about going through the front door?”

“I do not have the necessary sacrifices to offer the guardians…”

“You don’t have your ID? Damn. I think yer gonna hafta go in my window if you wanna get back into your room.”

“Can you not use your identification artifact to grant us entry?”

“It’d be faster this way. Plus, it’s easier for us to not get caught.” Students weren’t supposed to be outside the building at night unless they were given permission by a teacher or another authorized adult.

“If there is no other option…” They both went in the mechanic’s room. Kazuichi removed his slippers while Tanaka stood idly by.

“Sorry about the mess…” Kazuichi said, referring to the scattered machine parts around his room. Now that he thought about it, this was the first time Tanaka had been in his room. Well, technically the second time. He couldn’t explain it, but he felt the sudden urge to clean up his mess and straighten up his things, just because the breeder was standing in his room.

“You do not need to apologize for strengthening your realm with rituals and weaponry. But I must warn you, Tamer of Automatons, the true reason I did not initially exit through my front portal is because the Keeper of Defenses and Sanctuary was patrolling the corridors.”

Kazuichi nudged his door open, and, peeking through the crack, he could see Sakakura walking up from the end of the hall. He gently shut the door, turning to his friend. “How the hell is that dude still up? Tanaka, you think you can sneak over and get to your door?”

The breeder took a deep breath. “We shall see.” Peeping back through the door, Kazuichi saw that Sakakura had walked further down the hall and was no longer in sight. He signaled that the coast was clear to his friend, who was ready to make his move. With light steps, Tanaka crept to his door and gently put his hand on the knob. He twisted the doorknob once, a light jiggle sounded. The door didn’t open. He did it again, another jiggle. It still didn’t open.

‘What’s wrong?’ Kazuichi mouthed to him.

‘It refuses to open.’ They heard the clacking of feet grow louder, the former Ultimate Boxer muttering to himself as he traveled back towards their way.

‘Come back! Come back!’ He reached out his hand, motioning Tanaka to return to his room. ‘Hurry!’

In no time, Tanaka was back in his dorm just as Sakakura turned down their hall. Kazuichi shut his door and locked it, releasing a breath he didn’t know he was holding in.

The mechanic pinched his nose. “What the hell was that?”

Tanaka didn’t answer right away, like he was choosing his words carefully as not to misspeak. “It seems…that I have forgotten…about the protection spell…I placed upon the front entrance…before I left…” He almost sounded ashamed to admit it.

“You take your credit card but not your keys?! How the hell did you forget that you locked your door?!” Standing with his arms crossed, Kazuichi impatiently waited for an answer. Turning away from his friend, Tanaka let out a mutter that was barely audible.

“…It’s been a distracting night.” He reached up towards his neck, but when he found nothing there, he fiddled with the collar of his shirt and unsuccessfully tried to hide his pinkening face.

“Ugh, so what now?” The pink-haired man went to his bed and sat down, sinking into the soft mattress. “You think you can use your credit card to break into your room?”

“Don’t be moronic. The defenses of Hope’s Peak are not weak. I fear I am forced to remain here for the rest of this darkness.” He was right. Their best choice was to wait it out until morning when Sakakura left and they could get help. Or better yet, Kazuichi could try and fix the doorknob himself. Hopefully, Tanaka wouldn’t mind staying in his room.

“Wait. What?” he wondered aloud. Then it dawned on him. Tanaka was going to spend the rest of the night in his room. _His room_. With him. Just the two of them. _Alone_.

“Worry not, Tamer of Automatons.” He took a seat on the mechanic’s desk chair, adjusting himself to a comfortable position. “I will not disturb you in your slumber. I do not wish to overstep my boundaries since I’ve requested much of you already.”

“N-no, you didn’t do anythin’ wrong. Uh, hey, are ya gonna sleep in my chair?”

“Yes. As I said, I do not wish to overstep my boundaries.” Tanaka was so considerate, not wanting to do anything that might make him uncomfortable.

“What? C’mon, man. You’re gonna wake up all stiff.”

“It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not.”

“This is nothing to an all-powerful being such as I.”

“That’s not the point, dude. Just come sleep on my bed—” he blurted, but it was too late. The black-haired man flinched in shock, and Kazuichi did the same despite being the one who made the offer. Tanaka flushed pink all the way up to his ears and, once again, reached instinctively for his scarf.

“Wh-what?!” Yeah, it was definitely too late. He might as well just go full circle and commit to whatever the hell he was trying to do.

“Uh, well, yeah! We’re friends!” He panicked and tried to think of a reason—any reason—that could explain what he said. “I-I don’t want you to sleep in my chair or on the floor or somethin’! That would just make me look like a bad friend!”

“You don’t have to—”

“No buts!” Kazuichi got up and pulled Tanaka out of his chair. The mechanic dragged him to his bed and threw him on the mattress. “It’s totally normal for guy friends to do this! We help each other out!” It sounded more like he was trying to convince himself rather than Tanaka.

“But—”

“No buts, Hamster-chan! It’s either you sleep on my bed or I’m kicking you outside!” Tears of embarrassment welled up in his eyes as he heard himself speak.

“…You wouldn’t dare.”

“You think I wouldn’t?! I have rights ya know! Yer lucky I didn’t kick you outta my room the first time!” A few seconds passed as Tanaka considered the ultimatum.

“…As you wish.” Tanaka took off his slippers and crawled under the covers.

Kazuichi did a double take. “H-huh?! I-I mean, yeah! Now go on the other side of the bed!”

“Hahahaha…As you wish, Souda.” Hold on, did Gundham Tanaka just genuinely laugh? Not his usual smirking or overlord laughter, but an honest to goodness laugh? That Kazuichi Souda caused? He must be delusional…right?

“Y-yeah…um, can you scoot over?” He took off his glasses and put them on the nightstand, then he slowly got under his blankets. They both faced opposite directions with Tanaka towards the wall and Kazuichi out to the rest of the room. Minutes ticked by, and soon Kazuichi could hear the light snoring of a certain breeder hang in the air. Maybe Tanaka was more tired than he thought.

However, unlike Tanaka, Kazuichi couldn’t sleep. He was wide awake, nervous out of his mind, and had a face redder than Koizumi’s hair. What the hell was he thinking? Scratch that, he wasn’t thinking at all. The mechanic was paralyzed. He couldn’t bring himself to move a muscle for fear that he might wake Tanaka up. But they weren’t that close to each other, were they?

Suddenly, he was very aware of his situation. He was sharing a bed. With Gundham Tanaka. The same Gundham Tanaka who he was yelling his head off a few minutes ago. And funny enough, it didn’t feel wrong. Almost…natural.

Wait. What?

No. No way.

It was totally normal for friends to help each other. It’s totally normal for guys to share a bed together. Just two guys, laying down in bed in the dark. Next to each other. After sneaking out at night.

Yep, totally normal.

…

…He didn’t feel convinced.

Thankfully, he felt his tiredness catch up with him. His eyelids grew heavy and his breathing slowed. He was about to drift off into sleep when he felt something long and heavy being slung over his torso. Kazuichi froze. There was a large warmth engulfing his back. He could feel legs intertwining with his, soles caressing the tops of his feet. A huff of hot air landed on his neck, giving him tingles down his spine. Kazuichi didn’t have to look to know what was going on.

Gundham Tanaka was _spooning_ him.

Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god.

He was going to die.

He was going to die in his former rival’s arms with a cherry red face and his brain in an emotional mush. His heart was beating out of his chest. It felt like he was going to explode into a billion pieces.

“T-Tanaka?” he weakly whispered. Tanaka didn’t say anything and only hugged the mechanic tighter. The pink-haired man’s breath hitched as he felt something…different behind him. Though he didn’t want to admit it, he could feel a bump being pressed up against his back. “T-T-Tanaka?!”

“…Hrmm…Souda…Kazuichi…”

What. The. Fuck.

Kazuichi just wanted his suffering to be over. Because now, he was half-hard, trapped under his friend’s arm, and that same friend just said his name in his sleep.

He had two choices: Either wake Tanaka up and ask him to get the hell off him or wait it out until morning. The first option just seemed rude, but then again suffocating someone with their surprisingly massive chest and well-toned body isn’t exactly the nicest thing in the world. And if he did wake him up, he could guarantee that he would never want to look Tanaka in the eyes again. An exaggeration, sure, but he really didn’t want to go through the embarrassment.

Then there was the second option. If he waited it out, maybe he could pretend like this never happened. He knew Tanaka usually woke up early to tend to the animals at the farm, so it was probably safe to say that the breeder would discover their position in the morning and choose not to say anything about it for Kazuichi’s sake. That way, they could save each other the awkwardness.

Waiting it out it was, then.

He took a slow, deep breath and relaxed himself. Closing his eyes, he found that going to sleep like this wasn’t so bad. He felt warm and cozy—safe, even—being held by Tanaka. A smile crept onto Kazuichi’s face, his feelings of anxiety and worry faded away and were replaced by calm and happiness. It was the best he ever felt going to sleep and deep down, he wouldn’t mind going to sleep this way again.

Maybe he did have a crush on Gundham Tanaka.

And Kazuichi didn’t mind it.

Not at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gundham is a Disney Princess and no one can convince me otherwise
> 
> If you guys want, I can write another chapter that tells what happens to these two idiots in the morning.
> 
> EDIT: Thanks for the comments everyone! I'm now in the process of writing the second part to this oneshot so i guess it isn't really a oneshot anymore but whatever. I didn't really expect to write the second part but I do have a few ideas on how it's gonna go. This might take a while since I haven't totally figured out what the ending is going to be, but thank you for the support! It means a lot and I would love to keep writing soudam.
> 
> EDIT 2: The second part is now up!


	2. The Next Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happened to these two idiots in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long! December was an emotional roller coaster for me and it was hard to find the time and motivation to write. I was in a writing slump for weeks up until a few days ago where I felt a sudden burst of "I NEED TO FINISH THIS FIC NOW!!" And this thing was wayyyy longer than I thought. 
> 
> Thank you for the support on this fic! It means so much that you guys like it!

The sounds of quick footsteps pacing back and forth woke Kazuichi up, but just barely. His body was still paralyzed, sluggish with tiredness and stiffness from sleeping in the same position. That warmness behind him was gone. He felt colder. Lonelier. But he knew that Tanaka wouldn’t leave him. Besides, Tanaka couldn’t get his door open last night. He would need Kazuichi’s help if he were to get back inside. However, he tried to believe that he didn’t leave for another reason. What reason? He didn’t know, he was way too sleepy to think.

He could feel himself slipping in and out of consciousness, the only thing grounding him was the muttering of a deep voice he knew all too well.

“—T-there is no p-possibility of him discovering. The f-fiend has not yet awoken…” Kazuichi’s eyes cracked open, giving him a glimpse of the source. Tanaka was muttering to himself, pacing back and forth all over his room. “…I-if he were to gain this knowledge, he would surely p-perish…! Our bond will be broken…!”

Luckily, everything Tanaka said went in one ear and out the other. His face was a cherry red blur to Kazuichi, but the mechanic had a good idea as to what he was doing. It was obvious he had woken up a few minutes ago in their…situation. No doubt, Tanaka wasn’t expecting that. He was stuttering all over the place like Tsumiki. It was so out of character for him and to Kazuichi, it was really cute.

“—I-it would be best if I uttered nothing of l-last night’s e-events…T-the coward would create a deafening resonance that would shake the heavens themselves…!” Looks like Kazuichi was right. Tanaka wasn’t going to say anything, and the pink-haired man was, for once, happy that he woke up early. Seeing Tanaka’s little freak-out was totally worth it. Bit by bit, Kazuichi was slowly moving further from sleep. Maybe it was time to tease the breeder a little.

“Tanaka…?” Kazuichi mumbled. Half-lidded brown orbs met widening gray ones. “Mmm…What’re you talking about…?”

“S-Souda! H-how long hav—!” He stumbled back, his feet doing an awkward dance around each other before hitting one of the small engines Kazuichi had lying around his room. His legs flew up. His body crashed down on top of more little machine parts, making Tanaka wince in pain. “By the gods!”

Kazuichi eyes shot open at the scene, his worry for his crush fueling him with vigor. “Tanaka!” Now he was awake, too awake. He swiftly flew up from his bed. His legs nearly gave out from under him from the soreness of being trapped under his crush’s arm and legs. But somehow, he was able to make his way to Tanaka, only for his legs to fail him at the last second, causing him to fall right on top of his crush. Two loud grunts sounded as he fell, and Kazuichi found his head right in the middle of Tanaka’s chest. He could hear the man’s heartbeat quicken as clear as day. In fact, he could hear his own thundering heartbeat over everything.

“S-S-Souda?!” Tanaka stammered. They both looked at each other, finding their faces to be a furious red.

“T-Tanaka?!” Kazuichi pushed himself back with all his might, landing back on the floor. He opened his mouth and spoke rapidly, his arms waving frantically as he rambled. “I-I’m sorry! I just saw you fall, and I just wanted to help but then I fell and then we just ended up like this! I didn’t mean to do it and, uh, y’know I can’t even feel my legs right now or my arm! I didn’t mean to lie down on top of ya!”

Tanaka didn’t move, or more like he couldn’t find the willpower to move. He was frozen on the floor, stunned into silence. Suddenly, his voice rang out. He sprang up and struck a dramatic pose, arranging his hands so that they covered half of his blushing face. “Erm…! Fuahahahahahahaha! Be happy! Y-your recent demon training has allowed you to become resistant to my deadly poison! Let us laugh uproariously! Fuahahahahahahahahahahaha! Haha…”

“Uh…yeah.” He tried to get up, only for his hand to slip and his ass to fall again. The stiffness in his legs were worse than he thought, and he almost lost all feeling in his left arm. Kazuichi tried again. This time, Tanaka ran over to him, dodging the scattered machinery and made his way to his friend’s side. Tanaka slipped his arm under his, using himself as a temporary crutch so that the mechanic could manage to stand. “Thanks, Tanaka.”

“Tch, you cannot even manage to stand? How pitiful you are, Sharp-Toothed One.”

“H-hey, it’s not my fault. I didn’t even feel this way until I woke up. This usually doesn’t happen to me.” They trudged their way to the door, slowly getting faster as Kazuichi’s legs got more energy. A tempting question slipped into his mind; a question that would make Tanaka react like an embarrassed schoolgirl. “Say, do you know what happened? I never woke up like this until today.”

Just as he thought, Tanaka fumbled his steps and flinched away, leaving the pink-haired man in the middle of the room. Fortunately, the mechanic was able to stand now, albeit with a small limp. Tanaka’s face was bright red, his eyes in a messy daze as he tried to figure out his words. “W-well, I-I—B-Being in such close proximity of an ancient being of evil such as myself must have weakened your mortal body! Know the deadly consequences when you foolishly invite chaos and calamity itself into your dwelling!”

“Are ya sure? Cuz my legs feel a little sore…”

“Y-yes! Y-you dare doubt Tanaka the Forbidden One?!”

Kazuichi hobbled over to the door, placing a hand on his doorknob. “Of course not, Princess Tanaka. But whatever you did to me—”

“I-I did naught to you, fiend!”

“Sure, uh-huh, whatever,” he smirked, “But we gotta fix your door. It’s still locked, remember?” The breeder lowered his scowl, recalling the very reason he was in Kazuichi’s room in the first place.

“Oh, yes…” He walked over to the nightstand, grabbing Kazuichi’s glasses before heading towards the door, all while covering his crimson face with his T-shirt. “You require these for your infiltration into my domain.”

Slipping his glasses on, he flashed a sharp-toothed smile. “Thanks.”

“O-of course…”

“C’mon, Hamster-chan, let’s get goin’.” Tanaka stood behind him, ready to follow his friend out the exit. Kazuichi turned the doorknob. The lights of the hallway windows were on, greeting them with a white shine. Every door in the hall was closed, the only thing they heard was the low whirring of the AC. If Kazuichi was right, it should be around six in the morning since that’s when Tanaka usually woke up, and classes wouldn’t start until at least two hours later. He always admired the man’s dedication to his talent, always waking up at the crack of dawn while Kazuichi always tried to find an excuse to stay in bed late.

Kazuichi took a step outside and was swinging the door fully open when—

_*click*_

—a small flash of light burst in their eyes. By now, Kazuichi was out of his room, and he was rubbing his face and trying to ignore the brief spots of white in his vision.

“Souda? Tanaka…?” he heard a confused voice say.

“Koizumi?” Standing in front of them was Mahiru Koizumi, the Ultimate Photographer, all dressed and ready for the day.

Her tone was one anybody would recognize. Most of the time, she would be yelling at the boys to be more reliable or just doing her best to get their chaotic class under control. She would usually fail, but that didn’t stop her from trying.

“The Grand Archivist of Visual Records?” Opening his eyes, Kazuichi saw Tanaka unfazed by the sudden flash, mostly likely because he left the room after him and the mechanic acted as his shield. “Why have you arisen at this time?”

“Yeah,” Kazuichi agreed. “We’re not supposed to be out early.”

“I got some commissions to take photos of the sunrise. Miss Yukizome gave me permission to leave my dorm early this morning,” she explained. Looking back and forth between them, her face grew sterner. “What’re you two doing? Why did the both of you come out of Souda’s dorm?”

“W-well we—"

“And…what’s wrong with you guys?” She pointed her finger around their general area, motioning to their entire bodies. Kazuichi looked to Tanaka, setting his eyes on his red face and messy hair. The breeder looked back at him, causing his own brown eyes to look down at himself. His staggered stance and shaggy hair were sending the wrong message, and it didn’t help that his cheeks were still pink from that little falling stunt he accidently pulled.

A few moments passed before Koizumi let out a gasp, covering her mouth with her hand and flushing her face with the color of a rose. Her eyes widened and her expression contorted to one of shock and horror. “Don’t tell me you two—!”

Just as the words left her mouth, rather…erotic images blipped through Kazuichi’s mind. Tanaka over top of him. Tanaka pressing his lips onto his. Both of them out of breath and panting heavily. Faces red and eyes glued to each other. And—

“AHHHHHHH!” Kazuichi screamed. “WHAT THE FUCK?!”

“Wh-what are you implying, Mahiru Koizumi?!” Tanaka exclaimed. He tried his best to do a death glare but failed because of how flustered he already looked. “P-purge yourself of those sinful thoughts!”

“I didn’t even know you guys were da—!” Koizumi started, but she was cut off with another shout from Kazuichi.

“We’re not!”

“Then why are you guys, uh, together like this?” She hesitantly whispered that last bit, not knowing what words would be more appropriate to use. “I knew you were desperate but that’s not an excuse for this!”

“What the hell are ya talkin’ about?! And whaddya mean by ‘desperate’?!”

“Silence!” Tanaka boomed. “If I recall, you used your abilities to make the ephemeral instants of this world eternal mere moments ago. I demand you hand it over to us!” Now that he thought about it, Kazuichi was blinded by the flash of Koizumi’s camera. He had been so caught up in arguing he completely forgot. Tanaka didn’t say anything this entire time about it, but why? If he had to guess, it must’ve been the misunderstanding Koizumi had about them that distracted him.

“Hey, you’re right! You took a picture of us didn’t you! Give It here!” He lunged towards her, only to stumble with his step and miss the camera clutched neatly in her hands.

“Watch what you’re doing, Souda!” she scolded. “Cameras aren’t cheap! And instead of grabbing it, why don’t you ask? _Politely_.”

“ _Fine_. Koizumi, may I _please_ have that picture you took of us?”

“No.”

“What?! I even asked nicely!”

“I demand that you give it to us!” Tanaka roared.

“At least delete it or something!”

“Nope. No way. It’s my policy to never delete a photo I’ve taken.” She took a step back, distancing herself from the men that looked like they were about to pounce on her. “That moment only exists at that time. If I give it to you guys, you’ll just delete it. That would be such a waste of a perfectly good photo!”

“At least let us see the picture!” Kazuichi pleaded.

“I can’t do that, Souda. I already promised that if I take any photos like this, they’ll be the first to see them.”

“Who is this ‘they’ you speak of?” Tanaka glowered. “I desire to speak to them, perhaps interrogate them of their true motives!”

“I’m not telling you anything either, Tanaka. Besides, I need to get going. I promised that once I was done taking photos of the sunrise, I would show my clients immediately. And—unlike you two—they can rely on me to be on time!”

“What a presumptuous assumption! I guarantee you my punctuality is not to be questioned! Certainly, I am not like this sloth-ridden fiend!”

“What did you say about me?!” Kazuichi turned to Tanaka, anger rising in his eyes. “I’m not lazy! You know I pull all-nighters just to get my projects done!”

“Perhaps, but for all other tasks you laze around like a pitiful infant!”

“You callin’ me a child?! I work harder on my stuff than you ever will!” That was a stretch. Both of them loved their talents and everyone knew how passionate they were about it. The mechanic wasn’t thinking about his words, but that was nothing new.

“You DARE?! My magical beast synthesis is far more important and complex than your pathetic machinery!”

“Pathetic?! I bet I could build a robot that could kick yer ass right now!”

“You know you cannot defeat me with your mortal body, for I am far superior! But if you insist, then I shall summon my armies of beasts and mystical apprentices from around the Nine Realms to obliterate you!”

“I’d like to see you try, Hamster-chan! What’re ya gonna do?! Kill me in yer stupid PJs?!” Realization painted Tanaka’s face at the mention of his night clothes. Moving his eyes to his still-locked door, he lowered his guard and let out a sigh.

“Tamer of Automatons, it seems we’ve become…distracted from our mission.”

Kazuichi followed Tanaka’s gaze and landed his eyes on the door. Now he just felt silly for fighting with his crush, but it was just like old times, nostalgic in a way. “Oh, crap, you’re right. Uh, hey, sorry about all that. I got all distracted because of Koizumi. Guess we went back to fighting again, huh?”

“I as well. The fiend was a false shepherd, guiding you away further from the flock.”

“…Did you just call me a sheep?”

“Erm—!”

“Well, doesn’t matter.” He looked around, finding that they were now alone in the hallway. “Where did Koizumi go?”

Tanaka scanned the area. “She has left.”

Koizumi must’ve walked away when they were arguing, which many of their classmates did after being a witness to their little fights. “Aw, c’mon! I wasn’t done talking to her. Man, we gotta get that picture.”

“I agree, but please use your skills to repair the entrance to my domain. The beasts are expecting me.” That’s right, the Devas and the animals at the farm were all waiting for Tanaka to do…whatever he usually did in the mornings.

“Right, right.” Kazuichi bent down and inspected the doorknob. Seconds later, he stood back up, rubbing the back of his head lazily. “This is a simple fix. If ya just get me my multi-tool pocketknife, I’ll fix it in no time. It should be in one of my drawers.”

The breeder wordlessly left his side and went back into Kazuichi’s room. Familiar sounds of rummaging echoed through the room while the pink-haired man tapped his foot on the floor. Some feeling was returning into his legs, which was a good thing since he didn’t want another misunderstanding to happen. He was about to yell out his impatience through the open door was when he heard loud crashes and thumps of mismatched objects.

“Tanaka?! What the hell are ya doin’ to my stuff?!” He tried to dash back in but was stopped by the breeder’s massive chest. Looking up, he got another sight of his cherry red face. Tanaka was blushing all the way up to his ears and without a scarf to hide it with, he just stared straight down. In his hand was Kazuichi’s pocketknife, which he quickly shoved into his friend’s palms.

“H-here.”

“…Tanaka, what’s wrong with you?”

“No-nothing!”

“…What did you do to my room? You didn’t screw up my stuff, did’ja?”

“O-of course not! I am Gundham Tanaka! I have seen far worse sights than the…the…um…” As he trailed off, he began dart his eyes all over the place and hid his entire head behind his shirt. He wasn’t going to say what he found, and that just made Kazuichi’s imagination run wild. What did he find? Which drawer did he look through? Oh god…what if he looked through his…

“Okay, whatever.” In the end, he decided to leave it alone. Maybe he’ll never know, but just thinking about it made his face flush. Before long, the doorknob fully clicked, and Tanaka’s room was unlocked. “Here ya go.”

“Thank you, Sharp-Toothed One. If you’ll excuse me, I have important matters to attend to.” And just like that, he vanished into his dorm.

“…At least he thanked me…” Kazuichi muttered before trudging back to his room. A small pang of disappointment hit him, like he was expecting more from him. A part of him wanted to stay with Tanaka and continue the fun they had. Though it was an unplanned adventure, he enjoyed it.

Upon entering his room, he found that there wasn’t anything out of place despite the huge clatters from before. Even the clothes Tanaka threw on his floor from last night still haven’t changed. It was almost suspicious; he could’ve sworn that Tanaka screwed up his stuff more than this a few minutes ago. He brushed aside the thought and focused more on getting ready for his day. It didn’t take him long to get dressed, and soon enough he was wearing his green jumpsuit and favorite beanie. His now pink eyes trailed back to the window, reminiscing on their late-night quest.

That reminded him. They said that they were going to visit the clinic when they had time to check up on the beagle. With that thought in mind, he went out the door and, coincidentally, Tanaka was coming out of his dorm too. He was dressed in his usual garb with his scarf, bandages, ice-cream hair, and that single red eye. There was some muffled squeaking coming from his clothes that he assumed were the Devas.

“Oh, Tanaka,” Kazuichi said. “You heading to the farm?”

“Yes,” he replied as he sped walked away. “I’ve been delayed and must make up for lost time.”

Kazuichi followed him, sensing a feeling of déjà vu when he tried to keep up with Tanaka’s long strides. “Do you need some help? I mean, I’m not that good with animals, but it’s kinda my fault that you’re late.”

“Fuahahaha…Thank you for the offer, Shark Mechanic, but are you willing to sacrifice your soul to the hellish beasts of the underworld?”

“Uh, yeah, I guess so. Just let me help ya. I’m yer big strong prince after all, Princess Tanaka!”

“Tch, very well. But I am _not_ a princess.”

“Pfftt…maybe. But let’s see if Miss Sonia can’t find ya a dress to wear.”

“How repulsive! I would incinerate it before you could even come near me. And as punishment for suggesting such an absurd idea, I would incinerate your clothes as well. Fuahahahahaha! Perhaps I could do it while you’re wearing them!”

“While I’m wearing them?! What is with you and wanting to see me naked?!”

“I said, I had no knowledge of your nightly garments!”

“And what about now, huh?!”

“You idiotic fiend!”

Their conversation went back and forth until they reached the farm, and they grew increasing louder as they traveled. Their bickering was so loud they were told by three people to keep quiet on their way to the farm. Once they arrived, it was nothing but chores. Cleaning up after the animals, feeding them, grooming, training, and in Tanaka’s case, just talking with them. There had always been a rumor that the Ultimate Breeder could talk to animals, and Kazuichi knew him well enough to know that it was true…probably.

Time flew away at the farm, and an hour passed like nothing at all. Tanaka was introducing Kazuichi to his bear companion, Grizner, when the pink-haired man felt a small vibration coming from his jumpsuit pocket. Pulling out his phone, he saw a text notification from Mioda.

 **Ibuki Mioda:** COME TO THE CAFETERIA RIGHT NOW

 **Ibuki Mioda:** SOUDA-POP HURRY UP!!!

“Who summons you?” Tanaka asked.

“It’s Mioda. She wants me to head to the cafeteria.”

“For what purpose?”

“I dunno. She didn’t say anything, just that I should get there ASAP.”

“Hmm…I see…” Was he disappointed that he had to leave?

“Well, I was getting hungry anyways. You’ve got the rest of the stuff here, right?”

“I’ve done this for many suns, Tamer of Automatons. I don’t need your concerns.”

“If you say so.” He walked over to Grizer and put out a shaky hand. “I-it was nice m-meeting ya, Grizner.” A happy roar left the bear’s mouth. The creature raised its paw and eagerly shook Kazuich’s hand.

“Kekekeke…you’ve made much progress, Sharp-Toothed One.”

“Y-yeah,” he gulped as he retracted his arm. “It’s all thanks to you, Hamster-chan. I had a lotta fun here.”

“You are welcome in this realm at any time. Now, go to the Emporium of Banquets and Feasts and rendezvous with your allies.” After they said their goodbyes, Kazuichi made his way to the Hope’s Peak cafeteria. When he neared the room, the smells of Hanamura’s cooking wafted through the air, as it did almost every morning. The abilities of the Ultimate Cook were not to be underestimated, and even though he’s a huge pervert, his cooking was enough to persuade his classmates to tolerate some of his behavior.

The moment he walked in, he was instantly surrounded by Hinata, Komaeda, and Kuzuryu. By looking over the yakuza’s short stature, he was able to see the girls of his class, except for Sonia, huddled around a lunch table further back in the room. They all seemed to be focused on something, but before he could ask what they were doing, Hinata spoke up.

“Souda, follow us.” Kazuichi reluctantly nodded in reply, then followed the group to an empty table. They sat down and exchanged quick glances with each other. This only made the mechanic more nervous about what was to come.

“So…” said Kazuichi. “What’s going on?”

“You see, Souda, it seems that there’s a little rumor going around,” Komaeda claimed. “It started a few minutes ago, and it’s gotten pretty popular with the girls.”

“We just want you to…explain a bit,” added Hinata.

“Hey bastards, stop fucking beating around the bush,” spat Kuzuryu. “Did you fuck last night Tanaka or not?”

“Wha-WHAT THE FUCK?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?!” Kazuichi’s yelling alerted Mioda, who zipped from the other table and gave him a huge bear hug from behind.

“Good nom-nom-nomming, Souda-Pop!” she exclaimed. “Ibuki is soooo happy for you! Congrats!”

Kazuichi scrambled out of her hold, spinning around to face her with tears welling up in his eyes. “I didn’t fuck Tanaka! What the hell gave you that idea anyways?!”

“It’s the photo Koizumi-chan took! Her _secret_ _client_ said it was okay to show the picture around!” She ended her sentence off with a wink.

“What pic—” It was at that moment he remembered. “HOLY SHIT!” He sprinted over to the girl’s table and pushed Tsumiki out of the way.

“Kyahhhhhhh!” the nurse cried. While Hiyoko laughed and the rest of the girls helped Tsumiki out of her…revealing position, Kazuichi looked with horror at the printed picture sitting on the table. It was the same picture that they asked Koizumi to delete a little over an hour ago. And, sure enough, the picture gave off the wrong vibes. It showed Kazuichi and Tanaka walking out of the former’s dorm. Kazuichi was hobbled over, his left leg being dragged on the floor while the other leg struggled to support him. Without his beanie, his hair was even wilder than usually, and having bedhead didn’t help either. His face was a shade of bright pink, somewhat akin to his hair. His glasses were on askew, and there was a considerable look of tiredness plastered onto his face. 

Tanaka was following behind him, his face completely red and hair all tangled. He wore an odd expression, like someone combined embarrassment, happiness, confusion, fake confidence, and…something else he couldn’t quite place, mixed with a dash of half-assery all into one place. Needless to say, he looked pretty weird. And his clothes were a little wrinkled, most likely from how they rested the night before.

Without any context, almost anyone would almost instantly assume that they did…things…to each other.

“WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT IS THIS?!” Kazuichi screamed. He snatched the photo off the table and stomped over to the girls, all while angrily waving the picture in the air. “WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?!”

“Hey, dude!” called Owari. “So, you’re screwing Tanaka? I’ve heard his man tits are huge!”

“I’M NOT SCREWING TANAKA!”

“Oh yeah?” laughed Saionji. “Why is there a picture of you two coming out of your room after ‘doing it’?”

“WE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING!”

“That lame horny dumbass wants Tanaka in his pants! I bet he’s said it before! He said, ‘I want to fuck Tanaka!’” She mocked his voice on the last part, adding in exaggerated voice cracks and mimicking his stance.

“I NEVER SAID I WANT TO FUCK TANAKA!”

“Oh my!” he heard a European voice exclaim from behind. Kazuichi rapidly spun around, setting his eyes on the Ultimate Princess and Ultimate Breeder standing at the entrance to the cafeteria. The doors were beginning to swing closed, and the two had just barely set foot in the room. Tanaka had his scarf covering his entire face, stupefied into silence, while Sonia held her hand over her mouth. “What is going on here?!”

“M-Miss Sonia?! Tanaka?!” Before he could say any more, Tanaka turned around and took a shaky step. All eyes were on them. Unfortunately, the moment he moved, he walked right into the closing door. A dull thud sounded out. He recoiled, tripping over his own foot. His scarf fell away, revealing a bright red face. He scrambled back up and sped out the door without a word.

“Souda, are you alright?” Sonia asked as she approached him. “We heard a lot of yelling outside the cafeteria, though we could not make out most of the words.”

“Sonia, just a thought,” interrupted Hinata, who had been watching the entire scene unfold. “How much could you actually hear?”

“The words that Tanaka and I first heard upon entering were Souda’s. He said, ‘I want to fuck Tanaka.’”

…Why did the universe hate him so much? How the hell could Sonia say “fuck” so innocently and clumsily? Why did Tanaka have to come in the room right at that moment?

“Holy shit!” Kuzuryu guffawed, “That’s fucking good! Sorry, Souda, but holy shit! No wonder Tanaka looked like he was about to explode!”

“Miss Sonia, you and Tanaka came in at the wrong time! This is all just a big misunderstanding!”

“Why don’t you tell him that?” said Koizumi. “Didn’t you see him? He clearly needs you to go talk to him.”

“This wouldn’t have even happened if _you_ didn’t that that stupid picture in the first place! Who the hell’s your _secret client_ anyways?!” Kazuichi scanned the room, looking for anyone who might own up to the name. “Well?!”

Nothing.

“Souda, why don’t you go talk to Tanaka?” Komaeda suggested. “I mean, someone like me has no right to tell you this, but I think he really values your friendship. It would be best if you two overcome this and shine together with a brighter hope!”

“So, they aren’t dating?” Mioda said disappointedly. “Bummer! Ibuki was going to start planning the BGM for your wedding!”

“Ugh…” groaned Hinata. “Just talk to him, Souda. You’ll feel better about it afterwards, trust me.”

“Yeah…you’re right,” Souda admitted. “Any idea where he might’ve gone?”

“I believe he would have gone to the farm,” said Sonia. “That is where he usually goes to in moments like these.”

“Thanks, Miss Sonia. I’ll see you guys later.” His classmates watched his pink head leave the cafeteria and rip up the photo, throwing it into the trashcan on his way out. Kazuichi shoved his hands in his pockets and walked to the farm, mentally taking note of not to take too long or else they might miss breakfast. Though he appreciated the late-night snacks Tanaka bought for him, he would much rather have some of Hanamura’s cooking to start the day.

Minutes later, he arrived back at the farm. The calm, warm air surrounded him under the clear morning sky. Dogs, cats, birds, reptiles, and other animals filled the area and Tanaka was right smack in the middle of it, tending to a majestic black horse. He held a brush in his right hand, stroking its mane. The horse neighed happily, earning a soft smile from the breeder. Kazuichi couldn’t help but beam at the sight.

“Hey there, Tanaka.” The breeder spun around, his scarf covering the lower harf of his face while stoic eyes melted into more friendly ones. There was an aura around him as he worked that was fit for the Ultimate Breeder, something like a father caring for a child. Kazuichi wasn’t going to say that out loud, however.

“Greetings, Tamer of Automatons…” Kazuichi walked next to him, slowing approaching the animal that he had yet to meet. The horse whinnied nervously, only to be calmed by Tanaka’s hand. “Shhhhh…good girl…good girl…He is an ally.”

“Hey,” he spoke tenderly to her. She calmed down and lowered her guard, trusting Tanaka’s words. “Sorry if I scared you…”

“She forgives you, mortal.”

“What’s her name?”

“Seraphina. A name which burns into the hearts of those she deems unworthy, a title that is known throughout the heavens! She possesses god-like speed, and her courage is unrivaled.”

“Hmmm…that’s cool…” He flicked his eyes to the brush in Tanaka’s hand. Apparently, he didn’t do it too subtly, for Tanaka caught on and placed the brush in his hands. The mechanic looked up at him in confusion. “What’s this for?”

“Are you daft? You desire to increase your astral levels, do you not? You have already proven to be…h-highly resistant to my poisonous skin. This is part of your demonic training.”

“Are you sure? I’ve never—”

“Tch, simply follow my lead.” Tanaka took Kazuichi’s hand and lifted it up to Seraphina’s mane. The taller man’s hands were smooth and warm, completely opposite to his rough and calloused ones that always needed something to fiddle with. It was a nice change; it was a change that he wanted to make a part of his daily life. The breeder led him through the motions, gently untangling the hair and straightening it out. Time seemed to stop as their arms moved as one.

“This is…really cool.”

“It seems she has taken a liking to you, fiend.” Seraphina neighed in agreement, or at least Kazuichi thought she did.

“I think I can do it by myself now.”

“That honor is not for me to bestow upon you.”

“Huh?”

Tanaka removed his hand from Kazuichi, to the mechanic’s disappointment, and walked around to Seraphina’s head. By now, Kazuichi lowered the brush and just watched Tanaka. The black-haired man brought his hand up to Seraphina’s forehead and rested his palms. The horse closed her eyes and whished her tail. “It’s her you must ask.”

“Oh, uh, I guess yer right.” He leaned near her head and asked kindly, “Seraphina, is it alright if I brush your mane by myself?”

With another neigh, Tanaka spoke for her. “She agrees, Sharp-Toothed One.”

“Awesome! Thanks, Seraphina!” He raised up his hand again, almost too eagerly.

“Calm yourself, you idiotic buffoon!”

Kazuichi slowed down and took a deep breath. “Yeah, sorry. Got a little too excited there, huh?” Starting again, this time much calmer than before, he let the brush and the mane meet. Though a bit shaky at first, he soon got the hang of it, causing Seraphina to express her appreciation in whinnies, nickers, and brays, all which Tanaka “translated” for him.

“You are doing well.”

“Hehe, thanks.” He blushed at the compliment, though tried to play it off as just being happy, even throwing in a smile when Seraphina leaned towards him. But looking back at Tanaka, he remembered the real reason he came out here in the first place. “Right, so I came out here to say I’m sorry for what you heard in the cafeteria. Y’know how Koizumi took that picture of us and gave it to her ‘secret client’? For some reason, they decided to print it off and show it to the class. Friggin’ jackass…”

“Indeed…”

“So, then Saionji was laughing at me—like she usually does—and said that I want to fuck you.” Mismatched eyes widened, pale skin flushed red and a cough escaped Tanaka’s lips.

“I-I see…”

“And let me tell ya, that photo did NOT make us look good.” He was just rambling on a little at this point, but he could feel the heat rushing to his face too. “Uh, s-so anyways, I said, ‘I never said I want to fuck Tanaka’ and Miss Sonia told me you guys only heard the ending part. And after that, you ran off.”

“Y-yes…ahem, that is correct. I had sensed that there was a foul aura corrupting the realm, undoubtedly from the Wicked Devil Dancer. I…had simply sensed that the beasts here were in need of my assistance!” That last part was obviously a lie.

“And that’s why you ran into the door?” Tanaka’s face twisted into one of disdain, though Kazuichi knew he didn’t mean it. The mechanic was actually trying to hide his smirk from his crush’s glare. Walking into a door isn’t something most people like to think about, especially if _quite_ a few people saw it.

“Humph, there was an impenetrable barrier placed around the realm, prohibiting passage through the gates of pandemonium! Don’t mess with me! You mortals would’ve been trapped for eternity if not for my power! The only reason I left was because my hellish beasts required my presence. Yes, the world is always so simple…” He was really committed to not admitting that he got embarrassed. It was better to just let it be. Plus, it was kind of cute to see Tanaka so flustered up.

“Of course, man. But I just wanted to say I’m sorry. We’re still good, right?”

“The blame does not fall on you, but rather the vicious demon who chose to make a mockery of Gundham Tanaka!”

“We’ll figure out who they are later, okay?”

“Yes…They shall feel the fury of a thousand suns and the cataclysmic forces of hell!”

“Pffttt…sure. Uh, guess we got sidetracked a little, huh?” Kazuichi offered the brush back to Tanaka, who took it from him with pride. “We got caught up in brushing Seraphina.”

“Perhaps, but your astral level has increased significantly. If fate allows it, you may one day be able to experience the full force of her power.”

Looking up to the sky, Kazuichi thought for moment about what Tanaka meant. “Oh! You mean I might get to ride her one day!? That’s awesome!” As if on cue, his stomach started to rumble. He hadn’t eaten anything at all today and classes were going to start soon. “Ugh, c’mon, Hamster-chan, we lost track of time.”

Tanaka nodded in agreement, then they led Seraphine back to the barn and said their goodbyes. After a bit more cleaning up, the two men began to make their way back to the cafeteria.

“This was fun, we should do it again sometime,” said Kazuichi.

“You must return for more training; your power is still weak compared to the Dark Queen and I.” Tanaka pulled out his phone and checked the time. “We won’t have much time to replenish our energy, I have delayed you for far too long…”

“Hey, no worries. I love hangin’ out with ya! Yer tons of fun and time just seems to fly by when you’re around!”

He raised his scarf up and lowered his head, facing the ground while his eyes looked off to the side. “Y-your company is m-much appreciated a-as well…” Those words made butterflies flutter up in Kazuichi’s stomach and he happily threw his hands behind his head, locking them together as he walked. However, he couldn’t help but imagine how Tanaka’s hand would feel intertwined with his.

They could walk down the street together, explaining to Tanaka how engines worked and how to fix them, taking care of animals and playing with the Devas, or just helping each other cook or helping with work…

But that’s really sappy.

Maybe one day he would know.

When they got back to the cafeteria, a set of green eyes locked in on them. “Hey! Over here!” Hinata called to them as he waved.

Kazuichi shrugged and looked to Tanaka, observing how he buried the lower half of his face in his scarf and turned to the side. The breeder gave him a quick glance, then walked towards the table Hinata was at. Also sitting there were Komaeda, Kuzuryu, and Sonia, patiently waiting for the two men to join them. Each of them had a worried look on their faces, and on the table were two glasses of orange juice and two bagel halves. Kazuichi would never understand why Hinata liked orange juice so much, or why Komaeda’s favorite food was bagels. But then again, he had his own little soda addiction so he couldn’t really talk.

“So,” Hinata said as they both sat down, “What’s going on?”

“Look, we can totally explain this,” said Kazuichi. “But can we please get something to eat? I’m starving.”

“Our mortal forms require substance to restore our vigor so that we may cleanse this world,” Tanaka added. He shifted in his seat, turned to Sonia, and let the Devas climb out of his scarf. Jum-P and Cham-P rested on his shoulders, the former sleeping and the latter munching on a pumpkin seed. San-D went to Kazuichi and crawled into his jumpsuit pocket while Maga-Z went to Sonia.

It didn’t take long before their food was placed in front of them. Kazuichi got some pancakes and Tanaka ordered a vegan muffin that the mechanic didn’t pay attention to. They ate fast, keeping watch of the time while explaining their situation. The whole truth spilled out, except for some omitted details that would be best to keep secret. No one needed to know that Tanaka carried Kazuichi in his underwear or that they spooned together.

They could confide in the people around them. Telling on them for such a little thing wasn’t in their nature. Or in Komaeda’s case, it was “so full of hope that he wouldn’t dare turn it into despair.” A few questions were asked here and there, and in the end, everyone knew the story of how Kazuichi Souda and Gundham Tanaka snuck out to save a dog. Well, the important parts anyways.

“I am sorry!” Sonia exclaimed the second they finished up telling them what had happened this morning.

“Miss Sonia? What’s wrong?” Kazuichi looked up from his pancakes, momentarily pausing his fork in midair before slowly putting it in his mouth.

“I fear that your embarrassment is my fault…”

Hinata took a sip of his orange juice and cleared his throat before speaking. “What do you mean?”

“Koizumi spoke of a ‘secret client’ that she showed the picture to. While I did not say I was to be a ‘secret client’, I did request to see any photos of Souda and Tanaka getting along…”

“She-Cat! You are the fiend behind this catastrophe of an incident?!” Tanaka’s expression looked hurt, though only for a split-second, then he went back to his evil persona. “I demand that you confess your sins at once! Lest you shall be punished by the fires of my unholy army!”

“I only wanted to see you two getting along!” the princess confessed. “You two have been fighting ever since the beginning of the year, and I wanted my friends to get along. I did not expect there to be such a commotion with the picture and I did not see anything wrong with it when Koizumi first showed it to me. So, I allowed her to show it along with the other photos she had taken as of late. There must have been a miscommunication when the photo was shared among the class. I sincerely apologize for the trouble I have caused…”

She didn’t have any bad intentions; she just wanted her friends to be happy. Plus, Sonia was known for lacking a bit of common sense, so they didn’t hold it against her.

“Hey, it’s alright. It was a mistake, it happens,” Kazuichi assured her. “Besides, this was actually pretty funny. Sure, listenin’ to Saionji yell at me again wasn’t that fun, but it’s all good.”

“I agree, Dark Queen. Past defeats will plague the mind of future victories.”

“Thank you,” she smiled with relief. “You are right. Do not worry! This problem will be gone by tomorrow fo’ sho’!”

“She’s right,” chimed in Komaeda. “Your hope will shine through this moment and continue on! Once the day is done, you’ll be able to see that dog and give him a new home. As expected of such wonderful Ultimates!”

“He is at the veterinarian right now, correct?” Sonia asked. Her caring hands went to petting Maga-Z, to which he happily allowed.

Tanaka snickered, then the Devas scurried back into his scarf except, oddly enough, Sand-D, who stayed quietly in the pink-haired man’s pocket. “That’s correct. The Tamer of Automatons and I are to visit the domain later this light.”

“Yep, we gotta check up on ‘im,” Kazuichi said as he finished up his breakfast, shoving the last forkful of his pancakes in his mouth. “Gonna do it after classes.”

“Good on you, bastard,” scoffed Kuzuryu. “But class is going to start soon, so you better hurry up and get the hell outta here.” The yakuza got up and joined Pekoyama in leaving the room, going across the cafeteria where the girls were also getting to class.

“He’s right, we should get going,” Komaeda said as he left his seat. Hinata and Sonia did the same and stood by waiting for their friends to put away their plates. After that, they all walked down the hallway to Miss Yukizome’s classroom, spending the short trip talking about nothing in particular. Some stuff about work, animals, ghosts, Komeada’s most recent encounter with bad luck, the usual things.

The entire time, Tanaka kept bumping into him as he walked. That could’ve just been his imagination, but he felt the space between them grow smaller and smaller as they walked. It was nice, comfortable, and a little nerve wracking. He wanted to do it again. Maybe in a park or something.

Eventually, they arrived at the classroom. The same routine as any other day, but this time Kazuichi had to force himself to not look at Tanaka and allow his mind to wander. He just wasn’t up for school today. Paying attention to Miss Yukizome was a challenge this morning, and he could swear there was a burning gaze from somewhere in the room, though he didn’t know where. At least the lessons weren’t that hard. Math and science were child’s play to the Ultimate Mechanic. English wasn’t too hard since he brushed up on reading foreign manuals on machinery. Though he wished he could say the same for some other subjects…

Classes felt like forever and when the final bell rang, signaling that school was done for the day, Kazuichi felt a huge weight off his shoulders. He and Tanaka stayed behind in the classroom and waited for everyone else to filter out. As far as he knew, rumors of the picture had gone as fast as they had come, and his moment in the spotlight was now gone. Thank god.

Tanaka approached his desk, causing San-D—who had been in Kazuichi’s pocket since they left the cafeteria—to climb up the breeder’s arm and disappear into his scarf. “Mortal, I have sent an enchanted message through the electronic barrier to the healers of mythical beasts. They are expecting our appearance soon.”

“Cool. You ready?” He was given a terse nod in response. “Let’s go.”

Following the familiar path, they walked to the clinic, passed the convenience store, and took their time under the bright afternoon sun. Kazuichi could feel the looks from people on the streets, briefly acknowledging his flashy style and the emo guy next to him. He had gotten used to it by now, but there was something about today that made his hairs stand on edge. It was probably the shitty morning that screwed up his day, though being with his crush made up for that completely and then some.

The clinic was the same as last night, aside from the small amount of people who were waiting for their services. Pets of all kinds were in the waiting room: dog, cat, bird, lizard, fish, snake, and some others he didn’t recognize right away. He remembered Tanaka saying that these people were really good at what they do, so it made sense that there were so many people.

“Hello, Tanaka! Hello, Souda!” said the same woman from last night. She was leaning over the front desk, looking much happier and more awake. Kazuichi should really learn her name. He didn’t bother to check her nametag last time and for some reason, she wasn’t wearing it today.

“Hey!” Kazuichi responded. “So, uh, this might seem weird, but what’s your name?”

“Oh! I’m sorry! I forgot to introduce myself last night. And Tanaka didn’t mention my name either?” She gave Tanaka a side-ways glance, earning her a surprised stutter from the Supreme Overlord of Ice himself.

“Erm, th-the topic was overlooked in our haste…” he said sheepishly.

“Hah, it’s fine, Tanaka. You were just worried for the dog. My name is Shiori Kanzaki. Sorry about that, my nametag was damaged earlier today by one of the poodles that were brought in. A feisty little thing. If you follow me, I’ll bring you to the beagle you brought in.”

“Can you, uh, just leave the front desk like that?” Kazuichi questioned.

“I asked someone to cover for me when Tanaka texted me that you two were coming.” They followed her to a room farther in the back, past all the patient rooms and the doctors. She went into what can only be assumed to be an indoor doggy play area. It was a wide-open space filled with toys and other things dogs would like. There were a variety of dog breeds from a German Shepherd to rottweilers to a lone chihuahua playing in the corner. But Kazuichi’s eyes instantly went to the beagle eagerly waiting by the front gate. “He’s been doing much better. We fed him, cleaned him up, and bandaged up that leg of his. There hasn’t been a report for a missing beagle, so he might be a stray. There’s no collar and no sign of any owner.”

They went in the pen, and the beagle ran up to them as quickly and carefully as he could. Kazuichi kneeled and pet the dog on his head, receiving a joyful licking of his hand in return. The mechanic looked up to Kanzaki, his face turning to one of concern and worry. “A stray? Then what’ll happened to him after his leg gets better?”

“We’re not completely sure. If no one shows up, then we might have to put him in the shelter.” The beagle went up to Tanaka and rubbed his head against the man’s leg. A bark sounded out as Tanaka went to pet the creature’s back.

“This hellhound has not made a pact with any mortal or sorcerer of this realm,” Tanaka said. Kazuichi could only guess that he worked some of his “Ultimate Breeder” magic and somehow knew that the dog had no owner.

“Are you sure? N-not that I doubt ya or anything…” Kazuichi spluttered. It was just a bit hard to believe, but he supposed anything was possible in a world like this…

“I am certain. He told me that he has no home after losing the one who birthed him to a cruel demon. He escaped the previous hell in which he was forced to remain, and he wanders this plane, searching for a soul who would be willing to take pity on it…” Though faint, Kazuichi could see the slightest hint of tears welling up in Tanaka’s eyes. Then, seconds later, it was like Tanaka realized that he had a moment of vulnerability and shut himself off again. Something about that sight made Kazuichi feel a little sad.

“Oh dear…” mumbled Kanzaki. “That’s awful…”

That story hit a little too close to home. A demon that made a mother leave his son? Sounds familiar. Terribly familiar. There’s no way Kazuichi would leave that dog alone, and he was so young too. In a way, they were the same. Kazuichi’s mother left a long time ago thanks to his drunk-ass father, but Kazuichi wouldn’t be where he was now without the help of his friends. He couldn’t leave that dog. He just couldn’t.

“I’ll adopt him!” the pink-haired man blurted. He jumped up and looked Kanzaki right in the eyes. “After he gets better, I’ll adopt him.” His words came as a great surprise. Tanaka and Kanzaki looked for any sign of sarcasm or a joking look in his expression, but it was nothing but seriousness and certainty.

Tanaka put a hand up, prompting Kazuichi to calm down a little. “Sharp-Toothed One, while I appreciate your offer, your power levels are not high enough to tame a powerful beast such as he.”

“Souda, are you sure you can handle the responsibility of having a pet?” Kanzaki inquired. “You still have classes at Hope’s Peak, and I don’t know if you’ll have the time—”

“Th-then Tanaka’ll help me!” He turned to the breeder, eyes full of hope and determination. “Right? We can’t just leave him!”

“Mortal, I—” The man was cut off by Kazuichi grabbing him by the shoulders and pulling him down to the same height.

“W-we can’t just leave him! You just hafta teach me how to take care of him! And, and we could raise him together! And…and…I-I don’t want…a-and his mother…he’s…all alone…” Kazuichi strained to push back the tears welling in his eyes. He trailed off, suddenly realizing how impulsive and reckless he had been. Slowly moving his eyes around the room, he saw that the beagle and Kanzaki were looking at him worriedly. A feeling of shame started to rise within him, and he shakily retreated, letting go of Tanaka and backing away.

“I-I…I’m sorry,” Kazuichi choked. “I d-don’t know what I was thinkin’. Shit, you’re…you’re right. He’ll…he’ll probably be r-really happy with whatever family that adopts him. And, uh, I’m…n-not cut out for this stuff. Just—forget I said anything.”

A crushing atmosphere replaced the once cheerful air. Kazuichi knew that he messed up, he messed up bad. Why was his stupid mouth and stupid brain always getting ahead of him? He sat down on the floor, gesturing the beagle to come to his lap. He needed a distraction, and that dog just wanted to lick his calloused hands like no tomorrow.

Out of the corner of his pink eyes, he saw Tanaka sit down next to him. His hand went up and he placed it on Kazuichi’s shoulder, prompting the mechanic to turn his way. The beagle lay peacefully on his legs as Tanaka softened his gaze.

“You need not worry, Souda,” he said. There was a small pause. He scooted a little closer. “I’m convinced that you will be a powerful master of this hellhound.”

Kazuichi’s eyes widened, the tears making everything seem a little bit fuzzy. “B-but you said—”

“Silence, fiend. Your incantations may be…m-more powerful than I initially thought.” He raised his scarf up, covering his pinkening cheeks. “I respect your will, Tamer of Automatons. Though your demonic training is not yet complete, I will assist you in your perilous journey and grant you my strength! Your stubborn resolve was immense, though you quickly shut it down and surrendered to your fear. I, Gundham Tanaka, will ensure that you and this hellish beast properly form a pact! You two will reinforce your bond at the realm of unholy beasts!”

“F-for real!? A-are you sure I’m up for it?”

“That question cannot be answered by me. However, I will say this. This beast has deemed you worthy of its power, and it will not accept fully another’s companionship.” As if to confirm it, the beagle lifted his head as high as he could and licked Kazuichi’s face. Their eyes met, big brown orbs met pink ones, and even though he knew it was his imagination, the mechanic felt the dog look past that tough façade he always tried to put up. It was like brown eyes met brown eyes.

Kanzaki spoke up, snapping him out of his daze. “Well, I’m convinced.”

Springing up, Kazuichi moved out of the pen, causing the other dogs in the room to swarm around Tanaka. The black-haired man didn’t complain, of course. In fact, he looked really happy. The Devas rested upon his shoulders and they were all playing together. Seeing his crush like that was heartwarming, and he carried that fuzzy feeling with him as he went to talk with Kanzaki.

“Convinced? Whaddya mean?” Kazuichi grinned.

“I can see that you’re a good man, Souda. And if Tanaka trusts you, I trust you. He has good judgement.” They looked over to the breeder and the canines surrounding him. A few chuckles escape their lips as they watched Tanaka teach some of his overlord poses to the dogs. “I can’t remember how many times he’s snuffed out a liar or a bad pet owner whenever they come around here. And he always says something like, ‘I challenge you to a battle of the dark arts!’ or something like that.”

“Hahaha, that sounds like him all right.”

“Hey Tanaka!” she called to the black-haired man. “Souda and I are going to fill out some paperwork up front. You seem occupied, so you can just stay here.”

“While you prepare for the ritual, I will remain to see that the demonic beasts are bloodthirsty and prepared for battle!” he declared. “Go my Four Dark Devas of Destruction! Let’s go Jum-P, Maga-Z, San-D, Cham-P!”

With a sigh, the two left Tanaka to his own devices and traveled down the hallway. Kazuichi was led to a small office area away from the rest of the doctors and specialists. It wasn’t anything special. A desk, a few chairs, a small window, file cabinets neatly put off to the side, a large computer on the desk, some office materials, and a few photos of Kanzaki with different people and animals from different nationalities. The picture the farthest away from the door was her and Tanaka posing in front of a lion.

“I’ve been to a lot of places,” she said, noticing Kazuichi staring at the mementos. “I’ve been to almost every single continent and met a lot of people, though none have had a connection with animals like Tanaka. And none of them have been as eccentric as Tanaka, either.” She offered him a chair while she sat behind her desk. A few papers were pulled out from a folder on her left and a black pen was taken out of its metal holder. They seemed self-explanatory enough.

“Uh, I’m no expert, but aren’t ya guys supposed to check where I live or something?”

“Tanaka said you’ll be raising him at the farm. Well, at least that’s what I think he said. He already has his basic info filled out, so you don’t need to worry about him. This is just so we have some records of your ownership and blah blah blah, the formalities, you know?”

He picked up the pen and read over what needed to be filled out. Name, date of birth, contacts, address, etc. The questions weren’t that hard, but doing paperwork wasn’t fun. It was extra homework that he had to do, but if it was for that dog, then he was willing to tough it out.

“Oh, and don’t worry about your age and stuff like that,” she added. “Everyone here knows that Tanaka is more than capable of taking care of animals so there’s no problem with that. He’s actually adopted some animals after offering to take care of them until they got back on their feet. There’s no telling how many pets that guy has.”

Minutes passed as the information was filled out one by one. Kanzaki was typing away on her computer, the only sounds in the room aside from the clocking ticking on the wall and the light scratching of pen meeting paper. Questions were asked here and there, like the costs and medical fees. It was all sorted out eventually. Kazuichi was just about to finish up the final page when her voice broke the silence.

"You must really be something. No wonder Tanaka talks about you a lot."

He lifted his head up, trying to comprehend the words coming out of her mouth. The warm feeling in his stomach rose again as the meaning began to sink in. "Huh? Whaddya mean?"

"Yeah, you're one of his favorite things to talk about. Not a day goes by that we don't hear of the, and I quote, 'moronic master of machinery whose appearance blinds even the Supreme Overlord of Ice himself'. Not sure if that's a compliment or an insult, but either way, you catch his attention. He knows a lot about you."

“Uh…thanks? I, uh, don’t really know what to say…”

Kazuichi’s mind was all over the place once more. Tanaka talked about him here? What did he talk about? How much did Kanzaki know? Should he be concerned? How often did he talk about him? Did he secretly hate him behind his back?! What if Tanaka thought he was annoying? Why was he talking about him? How often was Tanaka thinking about him? How long has this been going on? When did it start? How many times did Tanaka tell his friends that he thought he was cute? How cute? What else did he say?

So. Many. Questions.

And as if she heard his thoughts, Kanzaki gave a little giggle. Or maybe she just saw the steadily growing fear on his face. A friendly smile graced her lips. “Don’t worry, it’s all good things. Even though there is the occasional vent here and there, I can tell he means well. He cares about you a lot.”

The Ultimate couldn’t help but be filled with hope and warmth at the thought of his crush caring so much about him. He briefly wondered if this was why Komaeda always obsessed over hope. It was a nice feeling. “R-really? I-I mean, Tanaka’s a great guy, he’s amazing.”

“So, you care about him too, huh?” she innocently giggled. Her playful accusation caught Kazuichi off guard, causing him to blush a light red.

“W-well, uh, um, yeah! O’ course I care about Tanaka!” he spoke, speed and panic rising in his tone. “H-He’s a great friend and I love to hang out with him and—!"

“Are you done?”

He shook his head, trying to get back to his senses. “Huh?”

“The papers, silly.”

“What?” Looking down, he saw that his name was hastily scrawled in the final box. Kazuichi was in such a daze he almost forgot about the forms. “Oh, yeah, the papers.”

He slid them over to her. With a few quick glances and movements, the forms were put away in a drawer and out of sight. Reaching to the back, he awkwardly scratched his head in embarrassment for how he reacted and in relief that he finally completed everything.

“Now that that’s done, let’s get back to Tanaka,” she said as she got up from her chair. The mechanic waited a few seconds before leaving. His body just didn’t feel like moving just a little bit faster, the sudden rush of emotions was dying down and he was left confused and zoned out.

Kanzaki was placing her hand on the door handle when a small slip of paper drifted down from her back pocket. It floated down onto the floor, urging Kazuichi to pick it up. He brought it up to the light to see that it was a coupon of some sort for a nearby café.

“Excuse me?” said Kazuichi. “Ya dropped somethin’.”

“What?” She turned to see the mechanic holding the piece of paper between his fingers. Her hands flew up to stop him from giving her the coupon. “Oh, you can keep it. It’s for this really good pet café a few blocks from here. I’ve tried to convince Tanaka to visit, but he just wouldn’t budge. It expires this weekend, and it would be such a shame to waste it.”

“Is it really that good?”

“Yeah! It’s definitely one of the best I’ve ever been to and that’s saying a lot. There’s even a mini cake they have that’s shaped like a hamster!”

“No kidding?”

“Yep, it’s delicious! I would’ve liked to see how he would’ve reacted to it…” Something about her saddened expression immediately made Kazuichi want to cheer her up.

“Uh, maybe I could see if I could get Tanaka to come along with me this weekend.” He carefully shoved the coupon into his jumpsuit pocket, making sure not to bend it too much.

“Really? You don’t have to do that…”

He flashed a shark-toothed smile. “Nah, that emo Disney princess needs to get out more.”

“Emo Disney princess? Ahahahahaha! That’s a new one.” Her hands pushed on the handle and opened the door, allowing them to exit the room. “Oh, and I forgot to mention something. The day that coupon expires is the same day they have a special on all drinks. Coffee, tea, soda, you name it.”

“Really?” he said, a hint of surprise and skepticism in his voice. “Thanks for…letting me know?”

“Don’t mention it. Tell me how it goes when you two get back.”

“Yeah, will do…” The conversation ended there, and the rest of the journey was in a comfortable silence.

As they walked back, Kazuichi had a sinking feeling that he’d been played. To recap, Kanzaki just gave him the opportunity to take Tanaka to a café. Just the two of them. And he agreed with the idea. Was it like a date…?

What the hell! He _had_ been played!

What was he even thinking?! Wait, he wasn’t thinking at all! He was just trying to be nice and then Kanzaki—

…

 _Oh_.

She was good.

He didn’t even realize she was steering the conversation! Kazuichi’s mouth was just following along and, clearly, his brain wasn’t paying too much attention either. Was he really going to ask Tanaka out? Or would they just be hanging out as friends?

Before he could think too much of it, they arrived back at the play area where Tanaka was still playing with the dogs. The moment Kazuichi stepped foot into the room, the beagle tried his best to rush over to him, to which the pink-haired man responded by dashing to his side.

“Hey boy!” Kazuichi cooed as he pet him. “What’s up?”

Tanaka moved out of the pen, causing the dogs to go back to playing amongst themselves. “You fiends have returned. I assume the preparations are complete?”

“All the paperwork is done,” said Kanzaki. “All we need now is a name for him.”

“A name…” mumbled Kazuichi. “Got any ideas, Tanaka?”

“I am not the one forming the pact,” he simply replied.

A beat of stillness passed.

Kazuichi looked back into the beagle’s eyes.

It still felt like brown meeting brown.

Another beat of stillness passed.

“…Wrench.”

Kanazki furrowed her brow in confusion. “What?”

“I’m naming him Wrench.”

“Kehehehehe…Interesting choice, Tamer of Automatons,” Tanaka smirked.

“Why Wrench?” asked Kanzaki, her curiosity peeking through.

“It’s just…I’m a mechanic, y’know?” he said, not taking his eyes off Wrench. “And I know it might sound stupid, but I love building engines and checking out cars ‘n stuff. I’ve always messed around with tools and engines ever since I was a kid. It’s what kept me sane all these years. And…I’ve always been able to fix stuff with the right things, so I guess I know that Wrench’ll be able to help me out. I know that I can trust the metal in my hands and…crap, I don’t know—it’s hard to explain…”

His face felt hot. He felt like he screwed up bad. A sinking feeling in his stomach. The feeling of embarrassment. He wanted to hide. He didn’t want to be here. Why did he say that? He shouldn’t have said that.

He said too much…

“Don’t worry, you don’t have to say anything else. I understand,” Kanzaki said. Her words calmed him, and he felt the anxiety slowed fading away. He patted Wrench on the head, the soft fur from under his fingers easing his troubles.

“Souda,” Tanaka said. He put a hand on his friend’s head. His touch grounded him to reality. “You are safe, my—a-ahem, mortal.”

“Thanks, Hamster-chan,” replied Kazuichi absentmindedly, the spoken mistake not even registering into his head.

“Wrench will be waiting for you when he gets all better, okay?” Kanzaki reminded him. The fact that Wrench’s leg was still injured had slipped his mind.

“Yeah…okay.” Kazuichi left the pen and waved goodbye, a trace of sadness in his movements. “See ya later, Wrench. I promise I’ll come to visit you again soon.”

They said their goodbyes and left the clinic, leaving behind Wrench to Kanzaki’s care. The Ultimates walked down the street to Hope’s Peak Academy, the taller of the pair leading the way while the shorter walked behind. Kazuichi felt the cool breeze on his cheeks and shoved his hands in his pockets. He froze, only to let out a small sigh when he remembered what he put in it not even an hour before.

Removing the coupon from his pocket, he stared at it, contemplating what to do next. It wouldn’t take long before they arrived back at the academy and they both still had some work to do, stuff about homework and stuff regarding their talents. If he didn’t ask Tanaka now, he would chicken out later and never get the chance. The coupon expired this weekend, so it was now or never. Now or never. Now or never…

Easier said than—

“Something is troubling you, Pink-Haired One.” Tanaka stopped in his tracks and spun around. His scarf fluttered in the gentle breeze and his gaze was as sharp as ever. “Has a cursed been placed upon you? Are you weighed down by the sins of your ancestors?”

“What? No, nothing like that.” He took a step back, slightly intimidated by his crush’s concern. “What makes ya say that?”

“Invading Black Dragon Cham-P has sensed your fear as it reeks from your being.”

Of course, his hamsters would tell him. “You could’ve put it in a nicer way…”

“Tell me, what burdens are you carrying?” Kazuichi’s eyes widened in surprise at his wording. Was this…affection? He sounded serious, and it seemed like he was dropping his overlord persona for a short moment. Did he really care that much about him?

“I-it’s nothing…” He wasn’t chickening out; it just wasn’t the right time. That’s what he told himself. It just wasn’t the right time.

“…Are you certain?”

Fuck it.

“Actually, there is somethin’ I wanna ask ya.”

This caught his attention. “Yes?”

“W-well, y’see…” His palms were getting sweaty, his heart was beating a mile a minute. He couldn’t keep eye contact, so he stared at the coupon in his hands. His hands were fidgeting with the coupon. He was tapping his foot and swaying side to side. Seconds turned to hours. “I-I wanted to know if y-you wanted to hang out this weekend…?”

He saw Tanaka take a small, sharp inhale. He licked his lips. His mismatched eyes held a trace of shock from the offer. “…Where?”

“A-at this c-café thing,” he gulped as he held up the coupon. “S-some kind of pet café? K-Kanzaki said it was a good place to eat a-and—”

“Alright.”

“…H-huh?!”

“Very well, but you better not waste my time with foolish trivialities. I’ll inform you of the specifics of our rendezvous by the end of this day.” And with that, he sped off, leaving a dumbstruck Kazuichi behind. As Tanaka turned the corner ahead, the mechanic gripped the coupon tighter while a stupid grin painted his face.

He was hanging out with Gundham Tanaka.

This weekend.

Just the two of them.

His crush.

And him.

“Did…he really just…?” he mumbled to himself. “I’m…hanging out with Gundham Tanaka this weekend…?”

Kazuichi Souda was now on cloud nine.

In his ecstatic high, he sprinted right down to the academy and down the hallways. A few papers flew here and there, a few near misses with some students, a few yells, a few complaints, but he didn’t care. Everything else was an irrelevant blur to him. He rushed to his room and slammed the door behind him. He slowly sank down the door and held a hand to his head.

“I’m going out with Tanaka this weekend. I’m going out with Tanaka this weekend! Holy shit, I’m going out with Tanaka this weekend?! What the hell am I gonna do?!” A strange mix of panic and euphoric joy grew within him. Was this a date or just a hang out session? Either way, he was going to be with Tanaka and that was good enough for him. He’ll have plenty of time to get greedy later.

He jumped up and flopped on his bed, burying his face into his pillow. There was a faint scent that was unfamiliar to him. Lavender and…pumpkin? Some kind of earthy mix with…something.

“No way…is this…” He thought back to when Tanaka slept in his bed. That had to have been it. Kazuichi brought his pillow closer and deeply inhaled the smell. No doubt, it was from Tanaka. Memories of yesterday and this afternoon came flooding in, from being thrown out the window to only a couple of minutes ago.

Suddenly, he remembered. “Shit! I still have work to do this weekend.”

Flying to his homework-scattered desk, books, pens, and notes littered the area. Math, science, history, literature, and every other subject was all laid out in front of him, not to mention his projects in the workshop.

“Damn, I gotta hurry if I wanna meet up with Tanaka this weekend.”

He had never been so eager to do schoolwork.

And if only Kazuichi knew how much of a flustered, bright red mess Gundham was upon agreeing to the meet up. If that pink-haired idiot was on cloud nine, then Gundham was in heaven knowing that his longtime crush was going to meet up with him this weekend.

As he made his way to the farm, Gundham made a mental note to thank Kanzaki later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me thinking about what to name the dog:  
> kaz: im naming him shaw-t  
> gundham: SOUDA NO--
> 
> Also me: wR en C h 
> 
> I had no idea what to name him lol  
> And the horse's name I was like "ok this seems like something gundham would do"
> 
> Btw Shiori Kanzaki was a random name generated by behindthename.com.  
> And it was also an excuse to self-project some matchmaking for soudam hahaha


End file.
